Dear Slade
by WickedArtist
Summary: Robin and Slade exchange some brief letters. Will Robin learn how to write true hate mail! I don't own the show and blah blah blah. Oneshot. Random. HOW DID MY IMAGINATION COME UP WITH THIS BS!
1. Chapter 1

**A/N **- This was fun to write, even though it took about seven minutes. :3

* * *

Dear Slade,

You suck.

Love, Robin.

* * *

Dear Robin,

If you are going to send hate mail, send it with explosives.

Sincerely, Slade.

P.S: This note will catch on fire if exposed to any solar light.  


* * *

Dear Slade,

You ruined my cape. I hope you die.

Hate,  
Robin

* * *

Dear Robin,

I apologize. I meant to burn your gloves and maybe singe your hair. I had no idea this would ruin your cape.

Apologetically,  
Slade.  
P.S. This note carries trace amounts of arsenic. Do not eat this note.

* * *

Dear Slade:

Arsenic? How on Earth did you get Arsenic on your note?

Robin

* * *

Dear Robin:

It's a long story. Will you be my valentine - er, apprentice?

Love,  
Slade

* * *

Dear Salad,

No, and no.

Robin

* * *

Dear Robin,

Why did you mispell my name? I am not a salad.  
And why won't you be my apprentice?

Love,  
Slade

* * *

Dear Slade,

I typed what I said, and Star asked me if I wanted tofu bacon or salad.  
And last time I was there, the food sucked.

Robin

* * *

Dear Robin,

But I finally learned how to cook!

Love,  
Slade

* * *

Dear Slade,

No, I won't be your apprentice. I will come over for lunch, though.

Robin

* * *

Dear Robin,

No, I am not telling you my whereabouts unless you are joining me.

Nice Try,  
Slade

* * *

Dear Slade,

You suck,

Love,  
Robin


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N - Due to popular demand _(PEER PRESSURE!)_ I have added another chapter.

* * *

**

Dear Slade,

I'll kill you.

Sincerely,  
Beast Boy.

* * *

Dear Beast Boy,

Why?

Curiously,  
Slade

* * *

Dear Slade,

You killed my girlfriend.

Angrily,  
Beast Boy

* * *

Dear Beast Boy

And then she came back to life. See? It all worked out in the end.

Pointing out the obvious,  
Slade

* * *

Dear Slade,

It wasn't the same! T^T

Regretfully,  
Beast Boy

* * *

Dear Beast Boy,

I apologize.

Insincerely,  
Slade

* * *

Dear Slade,

Also, you kidnapped Robin and made him go all psycho and did the glowy-hurty thingy. And you harassed Raven. I don't think she actually wanted those tattoos.  
And you harassed pretty much all the protagonists in the series.

Dwelling on the past,  
Beast Boy

* * *

Dear Beast Boy,

What did you expect? I'm the villain.

Obviously,  
Slade

* * *

Dear Slade,

Okay, but what is it with you and harassing my girl-er, female friends?

From,  
Beast Boy

* * *

Dear Beast Boy,

This will make for good blackmail.

Plotting,  
Slade

* * *

Dear Slade,

You suck,

Hatefully,  
Beast Boy.


	3. Chapter 3

Dear Slade,

...

Raven.

* * *

Dear Raven,

Excuse me?

Slade

* * *

Dear Slade,

...

Raven

* * *

Dear Raven,

Well this is awkward.

Slade

* * *

Dear Slade,

I guess.

Raven

* * *

Dear Raven,

Wait, why did you start sending me letters?

Slade

* * *

Dear Slade,

Meh. Everyone else was doing it.

Raven

* * *

Dear Raven,

Wait, I only got letters from Beast Boy and Robin and you. What do you mean everyone?

Slade

* * *

Dear Slade,

Nothing.

Raven

* * *

Dear Raven,

Excuse me?

Slade

* * *

Dear Slade,

...

Raven.


	4. Chapter 4

Dear Slade,

I must inform you that you are not well-liked!

Love,  
Starfire.

* * *

Dear Starfire,

I'm the villain. If you like me there's a problem.

Scincerely, Slade.

* * *

Dear Slade,

Robin said that you smell!

Love,  
Starfire.

* * *

Dear Starfire,

I'm aware.

Sincerely,  
Slade.

* * *

Dear Slade,

Beast Boy told me to tell you, "Your mother."

Love,  
Starfire.

* * *

Dear Starfire,

If you are trying to send me hate mail, at least know the terms you're trying to insult me with.

Sincerely, Slade.  
PS. Don't sign your hatemail, "Love," if you're going to do it at all.

* * *

Dear Slade,

I must inform you that you suck.

Starfire.


	5. Chapter 5

Dear Slade,

You're an idiot.

From,  
Cyborg

* * *

Dear Cyborg,

Excuse me?

Sincerely,  
Slade

* * *

Dear Slade,

You didn't think this was a tiny bit weird?

From,  
Cyborg

* * *

Dear Cyborg,

What do you mean?

Sincerely,  
Slade

* * *

Dear Slade,

We've all been sending you letters. HOW do you think we've been sending you letters? WE KNOW WHERE YOU LIVE. I can't believe you haven't figured it out yet!

From,  
Cyborg

* * *

Dear Cyborg,

Oh.

Sincerely,  
Slade

* * *

Dear Slade,

I can't believe you took this long to find out. I mean, how'd you think we were sending you these to start with? It's not like there's a mail fairy that drops the letters on your head just because they have your name on it!

From,  
Cyborg

* * *

Dear Cyborg,

Oh.

Sincerely,  
Slade.  
PS. There isn't?

* * *

Dear Slade,

You're an idiot.

From,  
Cyborg

* * *

**Fini~**

**A/N - So as a note, I've noticed this has been one of my most popular stories. Due to popular demand, I've done all of the main titans, as requested, and I thank you all for reading my story and for following it, and for favoriting it, and doing whatever else you may have done to help support my story. I sincerely thank all of you, and now the Mail Fairy shall drop this author's note on your heads.**

**Avoir!  
**


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